My
family is not confined
to mother, mate, and child; but it includes all creatures
be they tame or wild;
my family upon this earth
includes all living things,
on land, or in the ocean deep,
or borne aloft on wings.
t
had been such a long time. Such a long time since I had seen him.
Over a year at least. I wasn't
prepared. I just wasn't prepared for what happened. As we approached his
corral he ran to me. Oh God the sight of him--still as sleek and beautiful
to me as Black Beauty in his prime. How could he possibly be over 30!
He's just gorgeous. Bless him, he wasn't angry that it had been so long.
He let me stroke his face even more than when I had seen him every week--and
let me kiss his face, something he had never allowed before.
Oh Avatar! The presence
of you reaches a place in my heart I had forgotten about. A place where
physical beauty and visceral attraction along with the connection of souls
exists with such ease. Oh Avatar. Your powerful presence is not just because
of your size and beauty--though those are so very real and breathtaking.
It's your spirit which is so huge. It's your spirit which first touched
my soul and changed my life. It happened the day I met you some years
ago when you were in such pain from being moved by your person to a better
place, but a place which was taking you away from your dearest friends.
I will never forget Avatar, I will never forget your pain. It was meant
to be, I suppose, that on that day as I came along to help my human friend
communicate with you that I forgot my usual ritual of protecting my own
energy before connecting with you. Because I forgot this protection, I
not only "saw" your pain, I felt it, I participated in it. It
became my pain too.
As I began to tell
you that you would be leaving, I felt your shock, your disbelief, then
your panic. I felt you go to your two intimate mare friends, warning them,
telling them you had just a short time for good-byes. Neither my heart
nor my soul will ever forget what happened next. With my eyes closed,
I saw three beautiful beings come together closely in a circle, three
distinct light forms in the shape of your magnificent horse faces--your
spirits merging in love. The sight was astonishing and brilliant, the
intensity pure. What I felt you feeling, though, can hardly be
described with words. I first felt the profound love passed back and forth
among you, a love so deep and real it took my breath away. And then I
felt your gross horror of being separated, so quickly, without notice.
I felt your hearts exploding in grief. And then with awe, I saw your love
and pain blend together with grace. The grace which allowed the love to
exist as fully as the pain, the grace which allowed the pain to still
be, yet not overshadow the love, the grace which after a time eliminated
the panic. The grace which allowed you to walk away from them, toward
your person with complete dignity and centeredness. I have been blessed
by the presence of grace many times since then my beloved friend. But
never, ever with grace the likes of yours.
Those moments, those
holy moments, taught me an important lesson to always protect myself when
helping others with pain. I was profoundly touched and moved but I was
also emotionally drained and tired for days afterward. It was a reminder
that when I take on others' pain it not only weakens my ability
to help them but it weakens me in general. I know that compassion is
not taking on the heartbreak or hurt of another. Compassion is providing
anothers' pain a sacred place to exist, to be acknowledged, and to offer
our deepest love, acceptance and understanding to that pain, trusting
all the while that the wisdom of the other's soul will guide their healing.
Compassion is not healing others. It's the offering of genuine empathy
and love to allow their healing to unfold in its own way, inits
own time. On that day, by not protecting myself, I was reminded of
this important principle. Yet, it was meant to be, re-learning this lesson
in this way, on this day with you. So yes, I re-learned the lesson of
the need for protection. But the gift I received was grace. Thank you,
thank you my dear friend. I will always love you and remember.
Flower
Essences and Animal Communication
to
Assist with Animal Death
The
Story of Lambchop and Blue Jay
by Teresa
Wagner
copyright 2000
What follows are
two brief stories of the use of flower essences with animals and death:
One in which I believe I used them effectively, and one in which I completely
missed the mark. I hope you will find them useful.
uffering
from bloat, Lambchop was in great pain. My shy, sheep friend was
also emotionally devastated from the loss of his beloved sheep companion,
Baby Doll, who died that day. I gave him Five Flower Formula for his emotional and physical trauma which he relished having rubbed
around his mouth and gums. As I laid with him on the hay, holding his
head and offering Reiki, he kept telling me he didn't know whether he
wanted to leave his body to join his friend or stay with those who loved
him here. He was very pulled, very unsure. Over and over I let him know
that either decision would be supported and that I would stay with him
as he decided (had I had Schleranthus with me I would have given
him that also to help him make his decision). I love this sheep
and very much wanted the delight of his continued company on earth. I
knew, though, that my role was to give him all the space and support he
needed to make his own best choice. Much as I "knew better",
I'm afraid that without the help of Red Chestnut (for me)
my bias to have him stay may have been inappropriately communicated. With
its help, however, I was able to calmly and genuinely trust in the wisdom
of his soul to make his choice, to cherish our moments of intimacy and
remain unattached to the outcome. Lambchop decided to stay. After medication
and a vet visit (to which he was transported in the air conditioned front
seat of a truck, much to the delight of passersby), he is now home in
his pasture. No longer shy, he is absolutely full of himself, charmingly
demanding of love and attention, and very happy. He says this is because "I decided to stay. Baby Doll didn't pressure me to go to
her nor did you pressure me to stay. I did what I really wanted to do.
I was so scared before you came. It hurt so much and I could see Baby
Doll just above me. I was so confused. Holding me and the drops made me
calm. Pretty soon I just knew I wanted to stay. Now I like being a star."
ears
before Lambchop, a little Blue Jay waddled over to me in my garden
one morning. He clearly didn't feel well and said, "The other birds
told me to come to you, that you would be able to help me die." I
was immediately smitten with this beautiful little being and began a completely
inappropriate campaign to convince him to live. I told him about essences.
He wasn't interested. I told him about a wildlife rehab center just up
the road. He wasn't interested. I pushed the issue. I didn't feel he was
near death and that he could be helped. I chased the poor bird around
my garden trying to get him in a box to take to the rehab center. Finally,
he went so far beneath a rose bush I couldn't reach him. I told him I
was on my way to a volunteers' luncheon at that very rehab center and
would talk with him again when I returned. I left a small bowl of water
with Five Flower Formula. When I returned, I found him beneath
the same rose bush where I left him, dead. The shame of what I had done
overwhelmed with me with remorse. As I cried and cried and held his little
body against my chest, his Spirit said to me, "All I wanted, all
I asked was for you to be with me. I just didn't want to be alone when
I died. That's all I wanted and you didn't listen." I have never
been so utterly ashamed of myself in my life. I knew better. I
can hear animals. I talk to them everyday, but I didn't listen to this
precious little bird's simple request. I am comfortable with death; I
am around death regularly. I counsel others on accepting death, but here
I was, little miss animal communicator and grief counselor, and I couldn't
honor this being's request to die with my companionship. As I continued
to sob and hold him, I was filled with self-loathing. He then lectured
me, gently and compassionately, about the need to transform my self-pity
and self-blame into learning--that it was simply time for me to learn.
I was to take some feathers from his body to remind me next time to
listen. I tried to pull a few feathers from his body and it just seemed
so awful to pull them, even though I knew his dead body could feel no
pain. I hesitated. He then said in a joking, affectionate way, "OK,
you can cut them off with a scissors, but you better do it. If you don't
listen to me this time I'm going to be really pissed." I listened!
And thankfully, for Lambchop, whose path I crossed later, I learned.
We have so many essences
available to us, so many holistic and traditional modalities to facilitate
healing. Applying or offering any of them without listening can be futile.
Had I simply listened and honored what the bird asked of me, we could
have had a sacred experience together of his transition, perhaps with
the soft support of Angelica and Angel's Trumpet . Instead, by bulldozing him with my solutions, he died alone and I spent
miserable days afterward recovering with Pine for guiltandSage to help me integrate the wisdom from the experience.
When working
with animals, it is just as important as when working with people
to listen, to find out what they are thinking and feeling, rather
than imposing essences or any healing based solely on subjective interpretation
of behavior, or our belief in what is right. In working with people, most
of us would probably not think of recommending essences for complex problems
without inquiring about and listening to the subtleties and depth of clients'
concerns, then matching flower essences to the specific issues of that
individual. Animals are best helped with that same level of assessment.
The use of animal communication and flower essences together is a powerful
partnership for healing. We can offer that synthesis by working in tandem
as practitioners, through cross referrals, or by developing our expertise
and practice in both.
I am extraordinarily
grateful to the pioneers, my own teachers, my peers in both fields,
and to the flowers
themselves for their help in allowing me to do what I most love to
do: Help the animals and the people
who love them.
Picture the Behavior You Want with a Positive Feeling Attached
A ten second technique to help you shape behavior and send love
by Teresa Wagner
|copyright 2006
Consider using this simple but powerful technique below to lovingly reinforce the behavior change that has been discussed in your consultation. You do not need to be in a perfect meditative state to use this technique! However, it is important that you do it at a time when you are not particularly stressed, anxious or deeply preoccupied with other thoughts.
It is especially important to not use this technique when you are stressed about , angry with, or upset with your animal. It is, of course, normal for us as humans to feel frustrated, angry or overwhelmed when our animals behave in ways that destroy our material things, wake us up at night or any other myriad of things that can disturb our lives together. This technique does not in any way presume that we will not have moments of negative reaction to such behavior. If you yell or cry occasionally in your frustration, you can still use this technique successfully. If you do meditate, including this technique/communication to your animal during
your meditation time would be ideal. Just always be sure to use it when you are not upset. The reason for this is that the technique includes both visualizing behavior and sending positive emotions. Just like with our human to human communication, we cannot fake a positive emotion when what we're really feeling is a negative emotion.
Many of us doing telepathic work have found that though animals do an incredible job of learning our language and will use words in their telepathic communication with us, it seems that the true heart of telepathy is pictures and feelings. Images and feelings seem to carry much more weight than words. And so, the technique utilizes both.
Close your eyes, and hold a picture in your mind of the behavior you WANT your animal to do (going in the litter box, coming when you call them, scratching on their post, etc.). Just picture them doing it.
As you picture this, send your animal great and gentle love from your heart, as well as gratitude for behaving in this manner.
It's also OK at this point to add words such as: "It makes me so grateful; it makes me so happy to have you do this, thank you."
However, unless you have already remembered and are using your full telepathic abilities to "hear" your animal's replies, it's a good idea when using this technique to just stick to sending the picture, the positive feelings, and just a few words, if any. If you start sending too many words, it might get muddled. It's of course fine to do that at other times, but keep it separate from this technique. There is something powerful about the simplicity of repetitive pictures and love being sent. Imagine how lovely it might be for you to have someone who loves you send you a picture of you doing something "constructive" and sending great love for you with that picture!
It is also extremely important to NOT hold a picture in your mind of what you don't want them to do. If they receive this picture it can be confusing about what you want them to do. So again, if you are in a place of (understandable!) anger at once again finding urine on your carpet, that is definitely not a good moment to use this technique. Wait until you are calmed down.
Like all forms of communication, this technique is not a guarantee that your animals will do what you want just because you asked them to. But it typically yields much more positive change than yelling, threatening, crying or ignoring the behavior! It also often brings greater intimacy into the relationship because of the repeated act of sending love and gratitude each day.
I hope this technique may help bring greater understanding and a closer step to conflict resolution between you and the animals you love.
copyright 2006-2007 Teresa Wagner
A Client-Centered Empathy Based Approach to Animal Communication &
Healing:
The philosophical foundation of my workshops,
mentoring and practice groups
by Teresa Wagner
copyright 2005
The
role of healer is a sacred trust in which the healer holds the
space for another to find their own way. A healer's role is to
shed light on another's path, not to push them onto the path we
think they should take, or to even gently tell them which path to
take. A healer's job is to merely shed light, however lovingly and
skillfully, so others can find their own way.
Whatever skills, gifts, abilities or healing modalities we have to
offer, they must always be given only with the permission of the
client, and must fit the needs and goals of the client. In a
client-centered, empathy based approach to animal communication
and healing, we meet the clients where they are, not where we are,
or where we want them to be or think they should be.
Our spiritual maturity and poise as healers and our ability to
create a healing presence for our clients is heightened when we
refrain from imposing our judgments, values or favorite healing
modalities and solutions, and rather, trust in the wisdom of the
other being's soul.
Image copyright Nancy Bright, used with permission and gratitude.
What is it?
In
the 1950's the late Dr. Carl Rogers created a revolution in the
field of counseling and psychotherapy in developing the
client-centered approach to helping others. It contrasted
sharply with predominant counseling theories of the time: the
Freudian psychoanalytic view that people are basically neurotic
with little chance for change, and that the therapist's role is to
project their analysis onto the client to help them adjust to life
as it is; and the Skinnarian view that emotions are irrelevant to
growth, that we are products of environment only, and that
behavior modification is the only thing that induces significant
change.
What
Rogers believed, researched, practiced and taught for several
decades is that the helping relationship, when it includes certain
qualities on the part of the helper, which allow the clients to
feel safe and to completely be themselves, can in itself
facilitate significant growth and change for clients. The
qualities he spoke about were later found through repeated
research studies (Carkhuff and Berensen) to be core facilitative
characteristics, which impacted growth and change for clients more
than other therapeutic approaches or techniques:
Acceptance of clients exactly where and how they are, without
judgment
Empathy: active attempts to understand the clients' world from
their frame of Reference
Authenticity: remaining humble and genuine as a fellow being with
a client, without creating a hierarchy or barriers based on roles,
degrees, titles, position, cultural or gender differences, etc.
Why I use it
As a
young undergraduate and graduate student of counseling in the
1970's I felt like I had "come home" when I was introduced to
client-centered counseling. I resonated deeply with the belief
that effective helping is not about projecting our beliefs onto
others about what is wrong and what they should do. But that,
rather, as counselors we are there to help them discover, uncover
and understand for themselves what is not in balance, what is
beneath what hurts emotionally, and to support them in finding
their way through the healing process.
Over
the next thirty years, the energy of the client-centered approach
has driven and guided my work through several careers: in
counseling delinquent adolescents, managing a staff and program in
a group home for adolescents, teaching counseling skills for a
national training institute in the juvenile justice system, as an
internal training and organization development consultant and
division manager for RCA, as an external training and organization
consultant for corporations and government agencies, as a hospice
grief counselor, a pet loss counselor and support group
facilitator,
and as an animal communication consultant. The context of my roles
changed, but my passion for using a client-centered approach in
each has never wavered. The client centered, empathy based
approach seems to act like a fertilizer for growth when used with
others. It allows others to open to significant self-acceptance,
learning and deepened self-awareness, without being pushed, pulled
or directed. I have seen this approach work quiet little miracles
of helping animals and humans open to love—from others and for
oneself, soften rigidity, melt down barriers, release held in
pain, and feel
release from a sense of isolation, deepened intimacy in
relationships, easier reconciliation of differences and
collaboration, and problem solving. The client centered,
empathy based approach helps us effectively communicate the deep
compassion and love we as healers so very much want to convey to
our clients, and want them to feel for themselves.
A client centered, empathy based approach is one
in which practitioners:
Are empathic—seeking always to understand the inner experiences
of clients from the clients frame of reference—without
needing to fit, force or understand the clients' experiences into
their own worldview.
Approach their work with humility, with no need to boast to
their clients, peers or the public about their abilities, titles,
degrees or status in their field to feel confident or competent.
Clarify the concerns, feelings, needs and goals of the client
at the beginning
of a consultation
Clarify for the client what to expect in a session and
describes any specific healing modalities available for the
session, so the client can feel comfortably informed from the
beginning, as well as have the opportunity to say yay or nay to
any healing processes, modalities or resources the practitioner
has described as available
Focus on the goals and needs of the client throughout the
consultation, offering healing tools, suggestions, of other
information only when relevant to the goals and needs of the
client
Facilitate an interactive discussion between the animal and
human clients, helping them more clearly hear and deeply
understand each other's issues, sharing all the subtleties and
nuances that are part of telepathic messages from the animal for
the human, allowing the human client opportunity to respond to
these—rather than providing mere declarations of information
Treat each client and consultation as unique, setting aside
all assumptions about species, breed or past experiences with the
issue at hand. Keeps these assumptions in one's "backpack of
knowledge and experience" to be taken out and used only after
careful consideration about whether there is a relevant match to
the client's energy and situation.
Apply healing modalities with great discernment of relevance to the beings and situation involved. Client-centered, empathy
based practitioners do not apply healing modalities
indiscriminately, however comfortable and skilled they may be with
them, or however successful the modalities may have been with
other clients. They do not assume that what worked for some
will work for all. Whatever skills, gifts, abilities, or healing
modalities we have to offer, they must always be given only with
the permission of the client, and must fit the needs and goals of
the client.
Always, always make suggestions versus imposing any solutions,
ideas, beliefs, ideas, philosophies, or referrals. The
client-centered practitioner respects the wisdom of the client and
the right of clients to make decisions of their own.
Listen for and gently probe for the unique story, feelings, and
underlying causes of issues from each individual animal and human in each consultation. A client-centered practitioner never assumes
the root cause or solution of one client's issue will be the root
cause or solution of another client's situation.
Do
not foster dependency; rather look continually for ways to empower clients become more informed, educated, linked to
resources, and able to help themselves.
Know
that all good healing is grounded in compassion and love,
and, that skills to effectively communicate these qualities must be developed and strategically applied to allow that
compassion and love to effectively facilitate healing for another
being
Meet
and accept clients where they are—emotionally,
behaviorally, spiritually, value
system wise—not where we want them to be, think they should be, or
where we are.
Understand that the role of healer is a sacred trust in which
the healer holds the
space for another to find their own way. The degree to which
we may hold another's
hand as they find their way varies with the maturity level and
needs of that person or animal. And sometimes in a crisis we may
even need to "carry" a client for a temporary time. But this is
always done with the intent of helping them get back on their feet
to find their own way. A healer's role is to shed light on
another's path, not to push them onto the path we think they
should take, or to even gently tell them which path to take. Our
job is to merely shed light, however lovingly and skillfully, so
they can find their own way.
Learn to be comfortable in the face of others' pain, and do
not attempt to hurry up
to somehow lessen the pain of a client so they as the
practitioners can feel comfortable,
competent, or a sense of completion of having fixed the problem.
Client-centered, empathy-based practitioners also help their
clients learn to be comfortable with their pain, guiding them to
discover root causes, and long term healing for those, rather than
offering only quick fixes to alleviate the pain of symptoms.
Understand the critical important of keeping their personal
opinions and values
about animal care practices and their spiritual beliefs to
themselves during consultations, to prevent inappropriately or
unduly influencing clients to make decisions based on the
practitioner's values and beliefs. Rather, they assist clients in
clarifying their own beliefs and come to their own conclusions
about what is best for them and their animals. This is especially
important when clients are in crisis and more vulnerable to
influence from others, such as an animal communicator, healer, or
therapist whom they trust and may see as a person of expertise or
authority.
How is a client-centered, empathy-based approach
different from other approaches?
Whereas the client-centered approach focuses on the beliefs,
needs, interests, personality and unique situation of the client,
the practitioner -centered approach emerges from the beliefs,
needs, interests, personality and situation of the practitioners:
Client-Center, Empathy-Based
Practitioner-Centered, Ego-Projection-Based
Focus is on clients
Help clients understand problem
Meets clients where they are
Make suggestions
Offers possible solutions
Works with clients' work view
Healthy humility
Comfortable with ambiguity
Focus is on practitioner or technique
Tell clients their analysis/conclusion of problem
Expect clients to be "somewhere" in their
paradigm
Give direction
Imposes solutions
Imposes their own worldview
Need to "be right", an authority, expert
("guide on side") ("sage on stage)
Need to fix things
In
animal communication it involves having an actual conversation
with an individual animal and their person, involving telepathic
translation of facts, feelings, energies, and images, while
providing emotional empathy, soul empathy, and acceptance and
understanding to both animal and human.
It is
not only an "intuitive reading" of another's heart or situation,
it is meeting the other being exactly where their heart and
soul is at that moment. "Reading" someone's energy is like
taking a picture and then describing it. The client centered
practitioner provides this gently and lovingly. When we empathically meet another being where they are, not merely
reading them so we can tell them
what we see, but when we honor them by caring where they are,
caring about what hurts or is a dilemma, then the "reading" we
offer, the telepathic information we translate for them, has the
potential to facilitate real healing.
Psychic analysis:
An analysis or "reading" of an animal's or human's energy or
situation. Done well, psychic analysis provides a clear picture or
"x-ray" of a situation, providing the client with clear
information on which to make further decisions, etc.
When psychic analysis is used as a stand alone method, if often
includes information beyond or irrelevant to the goals, needs and
concerns of the client When not done well, psychic analysis is
offered without regard for the client's goals, needs or desire to
participant in the practitioner's particular healing methods which
may be imposed. At its worst, it is projective information seen
through the filter of the psychic's values, belief systems or
their favorite or most comfortable healing modality. It may be
void of meaningful interaction with the client, and providing more
of a declaration of the information gleaned, without attempt to
help the client understand, digest or integrate the information in
a way that is relevant and useful to the client. This approach is
done from the third eye chakra without connection to the heart
chakra. Psychic training often focuses on third chakra
abilities--see and get the information —without regard for how to
safely and lovingly help the client receive and make sense of the
information.
Archetypes or Breed/Species Stereotype:
This occurs when the practitioner is dependent upon and or focuses
primarily on their information base about archetypes or particular
problems for particular breeds, species or situations (i.e.
assuming that most cats urinate out of a box for the same reason,
that all whales are the carriers of the earth's wisdom, assuming
all animals go to a rainbow bridge when they die, etc.) , rather
than entering a conversation with an individual being completely
open to that
individual's unique story, feelings, or root causes at the base of
a problem.
Having good information bases about the culture of particular
animals can be extremely helpful in understanding and supporting a
client. However, in a client-centered, empathy based approach this
information remains in our "backpack of information and
techniques" only to be pulled out when we discern that it
may be relevant in a particular situation. In a client-centered
approach, information is always sought from the individual being
consulted, never making assumptions that what is right for one
animal or person will be right for all.
While it's true that archetypes about animals, such as in Native
American cultures, can be a respectful and even reverent way to
view animals, they are completely irrelevant to and can skew
information received in telepathic conversation with individual
animals.
Any archetypal information gathered about wild animals is
completely out of the mind of a client-centered practitioner
during any conversation with an individual animal. If we don't do
so, every time we talk with a rabbit we will expect to hear
messages about fear, messages about joy from every dolphin,
messages of sage teaching from every wolf or messages about all
the wisdom of the universe from every whale. Because of my love
for whales and my continuing journeys to be with them in the
water, I talk with a lot of whales. One of the very first things I
learned from them is how silly it is to believe that every
individual in s group fits a stereotype. They've told me that yes
there are many whales who are very wise, old souls who are here to
help the planet in highly significant ways. And, that there are
souls in whale form who are here simply to experience the whale
way of life on earth, not to heal anyone or save the earth.
Cultural information about breeds and species should remain just
that-- information to be used when relevant and appropriate to
help in a specific situation. To assume it applies to all
individuals is as insulting to animals as sexist and racist
assumptions are to women and people of color.
It can help us help animals if we know something about their
natural history—how they bodies work, what their needs tend to be
physically. But it does not help them if we make assumptions about
them related merely to the group they were born into, and forget
to see them and speak to them as individuals.
Imposing Solutions:
In this approach, the practitioner is more comfortable imposing
solutions for clients than in helping them explore what they see
as the best solutions themselves or with providing them with tools
to do it themselves. They may assume it's appropriate and that it
may actually be helpful to impose ones' beliefs, values, and
solutions onto others:
• I'm
the expert. Here's my tool and I'm here to fix you with it
• I know what's best for you and your animals; Here is my advice
and analysis.
• If you don't follow what I say there is unlikely to be progress
or healing.
Real Life Example: Human client was concerned about best thing
to do about
her new kitten crying at the door. Animal communicator told
client: "Your cat
wants to go outside. All cats need to roam freely outside. It is
natural and
necessary for them. It is cruel to keep them inside. If your ten
week old kitten
cries to go outside, even at night, you need to let him outside.
Cats are nocturnal.
It's wrong to keep them inside." The human client, despite his
instincts to keep
the tiny kitten inside, let him out when he cried late in the
evening. He was
killed by a predator.
Real Life Example: Person upset with dog urinating in the
house. Dog tells
animal communicator that he does not like waiting until his person
opens the
door for him to go out. Animal communicator, without discussing
this with the
human client, told the dog that his person would install a doggie
door for him.
Then she lectured the human about how imperative it is that this
dog have a
doggie door. The communicator did not seem to care that the client
already
explained that in her rental home installing a doggie door was not
allowed. The
client now had a disappointed dog who expected a doggie door she
could not
provide, along with the original problem of inside urination.
A
greater need for attention, status or fame than to genuinely serve
others With the practitioner-centered, ego/projection- based
approach, there is often bragging or arrogance involved, a need
for ego stroking or to receive "credit for the healing." May be
more interested (even unconsciously) in the drama of
nontraditional healing work and getting noticed for it as someone
special, than to simply quietly going about the work of helping.
They tend to not have much humility and may have a need to boast
about their abilities and achievements.
Real Life Examples:
A web site with huge letters on the home page stating, "I have a
gift from God that no one else has, come to me and I will heal
your animal."
A healing circle facilitator and genuinely gifted healer needed to
provide a boastful run down at the beginning of each circle that
usually sounded like: "On Tuesday I cured a woman of breast
cancer. On Thursday I saved a marriage through my gifts of giving
God's love to a couple. On Friday I did psychic surgery and
removed tumors from a man's lungs." Exaggerated as it sounds, this
is a true story. The facilitator's arrogance began to get in the
way of the love
and light of the group to such an extent that people stopped
coming.
Assume that the particular values, paradigms, theories, techniques
that they prefer will be just right for perhaps every client or
situation. This is particularly sensitive when a client has lost
their animal loved one:
Real Life Examples:
An Animal Communicator, in an effort to be supportive, sends
flyers to clients and colleagues with information that blatantly
proselytizes fundamentalist Christianity, including statements
that belief in reincarnation is the work of Satan.
An Animal Communicator, in an effort to be supportive, sends the
Rainbow Bridge poem to all clients who lose their animals.
As common as Christian beliefs may be among some clients, a
client-centered practitioner is acutely aware that all clients do
not share the same spiritual beliefs. As comforting as the Rainbow
Bridge story may be to many people, the client-centered
practitioner keeps in mind that the beliefs it presupposes (i.e.
when all animals die they do not immediately go to heaven or
continue their own unique soul journey or development, but stay in
a beautiful place called the Rainbow Bridge and wait for their
human to meet them when they die) may not be the beliefs of every
client. The client-centered empathy based practitioner also knows
that stating or sending sentiments of sympathy contrary to one's
belief system can be offensive to the receiver and create even
more pain. Client centered, empathy- based practitioners do not
impose their beliefs on clients, but rather, helps them clarify
how they may find comfort in their own beliefs,
They are sure to write or state sympathy comments that are aligned
with the particular client's beliefs, or are careful to keep them
neutral regarding spiritual belief systems.
When I know a client is Christian in orientation, I may send them
a copy of the Rainbow Bridge poem. When I know their orientation
is metaphysical, I may send them a copy of Penelope Smith's tape
Animal Death, A Spiritual Journey, as it is metaphysical in
examples and philosophy. In any case, or when I am not sure of
their beliefs, I often send a copy of my own tapes, Legacies of
Love, in which I intentionally kept out reference to specific
spiritual beliefs.
Feel it's perfectly OK to shame, bully or ridicule clients.
Real Life Examples:
An Animal Communicator tells a client whose indoor cat
accidentally got outside: "Well, here is the location where I see
your cat, and you should find him easily. But if you don't it is
your own fault if someone else finds him and keeps him. It is
terribly irresponsible to not tag and microchip your cat.
An animal communicator and healer whose web site boasts in large
letters: "I have a rare gift from God that only a very few people
have" tells her client: "Your dog has cancer because of your
problems with your marriage. Your dog has taken on all your
emotional pain. I can cure your dog but you need to leave your
husband. If you don't I will not help your dog." The client left
her husband, then later felt this was wrong and reconciled with
him. The healer refused to do any more healing on dog unless the
woman got a divorce. This example is the antithesis of a
client-centered, empathic approach.
Misuse of the mirroring theory:
"Whatever issue your animal has, you better look at yourself
because you have it and your animal is mirroring it back to you".
A client-centered practitioner believes that though this sometimes
occurs and when it does can be a powerful means of learning, it is
not present in every problem or in every relationship. To assume
it does is overly simplistic and could be irrelevant or even
harmful to impose on clients.
Misuse of the emotional sponge theory:
"The purpose of companion animals is to absorb our emotions to
help us through life." The client-centered approach believes that
while it may be true that there are animals who may do this, and
certainly there are many co-dependent humans who do this, it is a
gross stereotype to assume—before even speaking with an animal and
feeling the specifics of the animal's energy and story—that all
animals are "mirroring" their human's issues. This is an example
of having a
favorite tool and applying it to every situation whether it fits
or not with the unique issues of an individual.
The belief that the core purpose of animals on earth is to absorb
human pain, or that even if they have additional purposes all
companion animals sponge up our emotions, seems a terribly
condescending and limited view of animals. The client-centered,
empathy based approach is one in which it would never be assumed
that the core purpose of every individual in an entire species is
the same, or that a life purpose for any individual is
pre-determined servitude to
another.
A Story of Empathy between a Famous Flautist and a
Whale
Some years ago I had the pleasure of attending a live concert with
Paul Horn, held at the Carmel Mission Basilica in Carmel,
California. By some stroke of blessing, my friends and I were
seated in the very front row. As this great musician told stories
between performing his pieces we felt as if we were with him in
the informality of someone's living room. He spoke with gentle
humility and with great spirit. When he announced that one of his
stories was about a close encounter with a whale, my heart
quickened with anticipation because of my great love of whales. My
friends looked at me with concern that I might jump out of my
seat. I didn't, though I sure was excited. I just listened, then
cried.
Paul told us that he had a close friend in the Northwest part of
the United States who was involved in training and caring for Orca
whales held in a Seaquarium. During one of Paul's visits to this
friend, he was asked if he might come play his flute for a whale.
One of the two captive whales who had been living there had
recently died. The surviving whale seemed to be deeply grieving.
She would not eat and would barely move. The people involved in
her care were afraid she would die. Several medical and social
interventions were tried but nothing worked. It was a last resort
to ask Paul to play music for her. They asked him to play lively,
happy music to attempt to bring her out of her very depressed
state. And so he did. Song after song he played for her and there
was no response.
At one point Paul said he got this feeling that all the upbeat,
happy music may feel completely irrelevant and perhaps even
annoying to someone in deep grief. And so, he began to play
soulful, poignant music that spoke of suffering and angst. Some of
the humans tried to stop him from playing this, expressing concern
that it would make the whale feel worse. But Paul continued
playing, song after song. Soon, the whale began to move after days
of remaining still in one corner. Then he moved a little more.
Then he actually faced Paul and looked at him. Slowly he
approached him, then turned and swam and swam and breached with
the grace and vigor. Then he approached Paul and opened his mouth
for food. His human care team cheered and cried. It still took
some time, but starting that hour this whale began to heal. From empathy he began to heal.
This is a story for all of us, in any situation where we wish to
help someone. Offering empathy to another being's overwhelming or
negative emotional state does not make it worse. It acts, rather,
as an agent to help the depth of that emotion emerge to full
expression so it can be released--allowing healing to continue and
balance to be restored.
Special Notes of Thanks
We
all need teachers. We all need guides from time to time to help us
figure out what path to take, and the tools we need to travel it,
survive it and thrive from it. I have been abundantly blessed with
such teachers and guides regarding client-centered work.
I
give my deepest, heartfelt gratitude to Carl Rogers for creating a
model of helping that addresses the heart of soul of
others—especially having done so during an era where this was
practically heresy. Thank you Carl Rogers, George Vogel and Lewie
Losoncy for inspiring and teaching me client-centered counseling
so long ago. It's been in my blood from the very first class and
will never leave me.
I
thank Jeri Ryan for inspiring me to enter the world of
professional animal communication.
Without your personal modeling and teaching in a client-centered
way, I may never have begun
the work. Your gentleness, wisdom, immeasurable commitment to the
animals and a client centered,
empathic way of helping will always be my model. Thank you. You
are a gift to the animals on earth and the people who love them.
I
also thank Ruah Bull for being a living model of a superlative,
client-centered counselor and healing arts professional. You've
helped me back to the true home of who I am through traumatic dark
nights of the soul and everyday stresses of life on earth with the
love and skills of your work. You know precisely how to shine a
brilliant light on others' paths with true healing presence. You
are the real thing Ruah. You teach it and you live it. How blessed
I am to receive your help. Thank you and bless you.
I
also want to acknowledge Toni Crossen for being a model of ethics,
integrity and leading edge competence in the field of
psychotherapy and in the role of being a human on earth. Thank you
for always being there to hear my problems and progress in
attempting to practice and teach the
best of what works in psychotherapy into the healing arts world,
You live what you believe Toni.
I am honored to be your friend and an across-the-fields peer. And
you're a sterling cat mother
too!
Thank
you all for starting me and keeping me whole and inspired on the
client-centered, empathic-based path of service.
Thoughts and Resources about Reincarnation Reunions
by Teresa Wagner
copyright 2006
Anticipating the return of our beloved animals back into our lives on earth can be a very exciting time. It can also be daunting as we worry about things like: where will we find them? how will I know the right time? how will I really know it's them? In addition to information you may receive during a communication session with your animal, I have put together some thoughts and resources to help you understand, trust, and manage the typical and natural anxiety of the reunion process. I hope it will support you and I wish you a glorious reunion experience!
From what the animals have told me, the decision for souls to come back together in form on earth is a sacred agreement. It does not happen by accident and cannot be forced. I believe that reincarnation reunions between and among souls who share a deep love and connection have been happening since the beginning of time on earth. What was different in earlier times is that we valued and depended on our intuitive senses as deeply as our physical senses. We easily remembered and recognized souls we knew from the past. What is different today is that we are in a time of barely remembering how to trust and use our full intuitive abilities, and therefore tend to distrust information that is not physically verifiable or "factual." With this as our current cultural backdrop, while we may believe it's possible for our beloved animals to return to us, we may understandably doubt our ability to know when, to absolutely recognize them, or worry that they will come back and someone else will find and adopt them. On this last point, I have had many, many animals reassure their human loved ones that they will find their person! Animals have told me over and over that the sacred agreement of reunion is not dependent on their humans knowing an exact time and place. The soul returning to earth and the spiritual guides of all parties involved make sure that the circumstances of return are in place.
Animals have also told me that souls considering returning to earth have complete free will to make decisions about what is for their highest good--regarding whether to come back, in what form, in what timing, where and with which other souls on earth. The choice of form, timing and place is based upon what would best serve the returning soul's ability to learn the lessons and live out the purpose they wish to experience next on earth.
Yet the details of these decisions do not seem to be made in a vacuum. Animals speak of guides and teachers in the Spirit realm helping, counseling and guiding them about these decisions with encouragement, wisdom and support. I often hear animals describing their plans with great care and concern about what is best for those still on earth to whom they will be returning. I always encourage my clients to let their animals on the other side who are coming back know their preferences: i.e. could you be less aggressive with other dogs this time? could you be as wonderfully cuddly as you were before? Asking for these preferences is no guarantee that they will occur, but just like in our human relationships, those who love us deeply often do what they can to meet our requests.
Animals have told me again and again that the decision to be reunited with a loved one is an extremely important agreement, made not just by them alone, but by both parties at the soul level. This is an agreement that is met regardless of whether the soul on earth is aware of it on a conscious, personality level.
If you are anticipating the return of one of your animal loved ones to earth, try to relax and trust the process. The exact timing and place of return cannot be forced, and often not precisely predicted, any more than a woman can force or predict the timing of getting becoming pregnant or giving birth. It happens in perfect, divine timing for all souls involved. Sometimes in telepathic discussions, animals are very specific about which litter, which shelter, what month they will return, etc. Sometimes this information is more vague—sometimes because the decisions haven't yet been made, and sometimes because the person waiting on earth is meant to learn to trust the process as it unfolds, rather than be told each detail of the reunion beforehand.
If you are feeling anxiety about how you will know for sure whether it is your animal, ask your animal for a sign to give your assurance. However, I do not recommend asking for a sign that you choose: i.e. "please lick my ear when you see me;" "please run directly toward me when I see you." It is much better to ask your animal to give you a sign of their choosing and trust that you will recognize the sign as from them, rather than attempting to force them to behave in ways that you control.
I believe that birth, death and re-birth to the earth are among the most sacred spiritual transitions we souls make. It simply doesn't work to expect them to be as predictable and easy to control as buying an airline ticket. There will always be an element of mystery to these sacred experiences, and we can never expect to be able to control them. What can help us, however, is to make an intention to trust our intuition, and to trust the signs we receive from our animal loved ones.
I fondly remember an example of this from several years ago. I was talking with a woman on her cell when she was at a shelter looking for her dog who told her he would be back about that time. Within minutes, the white dog she was looking at told me it was definitely him! The depth of feeling and love was very apparent and we were both crying happy tears. Having talked to the dog directly myself, I had no doubt her former dog was back and that this would be a joyous reunion. However, as I was told later, when the woman was driving home with this dog in her car she began to have doubts. She was very scared that maybe her former dog might still be back at that shelter and that the dog sitting next to her was not hers. So she stopped her car, looked at this lovely, large white dog and said, "Look I already love you and will keep you forever and care for you with all my heart. But I really need to know if you are my old dog. If you could just show me in some way it would really help me." At that moment the dog crawled on top on my client and put his paws around her neck in an embrace. A real feat for an 80 pound dog in a car! The best part is that this behavior is exactly what her former dog did all the time in the car. It was actually a "behavioral problem" in the past because he always tried to be a small dog lap dog in his big dog body! But in doing this in the car, my client was sure without a doubt that her old dog was back. And fortunately, it was the last time he crawled on her lap in the car. He had agreed to act like "big dog" this time and kept his word. He told us later that he did it in the car that one time because she asked for a sign.
There are many other examples like this one. And, ones where the confirmation is not so much about a distinct behavior, as an overall personality similarity. In many cases, people tell me they look in the animal's eye and know without a doubt it is the soul of their beloved animal. The feeling of confirmation is different for everyone. Some people tell me they need no confirmation at all, that they simply trust that the reunion will occur.
Keep in mind that reincarnation is not cloning. When our animals return it is because they wish to live out their next purpose on earth in our company. It is not to come back and be exactly the same as they were before. They may not look the same. They may not act the same. They may have some personality and behavioral similarities, and they may not. A soul returns to earth not to repeat a life, but to begin a new one—with souls they love. On rare occasions I have worked with people who are deeply disappointed that their animal does not look and act exactly as they did in their previous life, despite preparation that this may happen. In these cases the persons involved actually resented the animal and could not bond with them, nor recover from their grief of the previous animal's death. They wanted their deceased animal to come back to earth as if they had not died so they would not need to do the work of grieving and healing from their loss. Reincarnation of a loved one is neither a replacement nor a shortcut for a survivor's grief process. As devastating as losing our loved ones can be, death and grief are natural, inescapable experiences of life on earth and of loving. Reincarnation is a new beginning. Death, for those left behind, is an ending. This ending must be mourned and the pain of it acknowledged and healed. Though the hope or knowledge that we can be reunited with our loved one can certainly make the pain of loss less devastating, this new beginning through reincarnation does not replace grieving. Many animals have told me that the timing of their return is actually planned to be sure their loved ones have appropriate time to heal from their grief before their reunion.
I hope some of these examples and ideas will support you! You may also want to read Journey of Souls by Michael Newton. Though, unfortunately, he does not acknowledge the souls of animals, this book is a helpful primer about life between lives on earth.
I also recommend the following flower essences, which strengthen our ability to trust this process:
Hound’s Tongue: (available from www.fesflowers.com)
Enhances holistic thinking for those who may want to believe in animal communication but still may find it hard to believe in anything less than the scientific, or the measurable. Hound’s Tongue restores a sense of wonder and reverence for life, while also helping the soul to think in clear and specific ways about the spiritual dimensions of the physical world. Helps us synthesize left and right brain functions. Enhances spiritual perception of the natural world.
Star Tulip: (available from www.fesflowers.com)
Softens resistance to the spiritual realm; ability to feel soul communion with higher spiritual forces; receptivity to spiritual worlds; especially listening to one’s inner voice
This helps us connect with our Higher Self and inner guidance, and to communicate directly with it. This essence also helps heal crises of faith (such as conflict between your own internal beliefs about animal life after death and religious dogma which may have been imposed on you that is very different from what your heart is telling you).
Forget Me Not: (available from www.fesflowers.com)
Deepens our awareness of our spiritual connection with those who have physically died and helps us develop telepathic communication with them
This essence is for honoring your own intuitive impressions. It is excellent for if you place a higher value on what you think, rather than allowing your intuition to be of equal worth. It is also appropriate if you focus too much on outer events and not enough on contemplation and inward looking.
Ideas to Build Confidence and Overcome Doubts about
Telepathic Communication with Animals
by Teresa Wagner
copyright 2007
1. Deliberately spend regular time listening intuitively in all areas of your life. We must learn what intuitively derived information feels like compared to logical information and to trust it. To build and deepen your trust in intuitively derived information, you must learn what this feels like in all areas of your life, not just animal communication. Listen for the small and big messages from inside, the ones that may or maynot jive with what is logical, but you know they are right for you: no, these are not the right shoes to buy; this is the house for us—I just know it; I don't really trust this person; I feel good about this person; it feels like it's time to save money; it feels like I am really meant to read this book. Notice and become more acutely aware of what is feels like to know inside: yes this is OK or no this is not OK. If we don't listen to our intuition in any other area of our lives, if we don't learn what intuitively derived information feels like and the feelings we get when we trust that it's real, it is much harder to trust telepathic information from animals. You might want to listen to CD's on developing intuition such as those by Sanaya Roman at
2. Spend time in inner stillness, alone. There is no right or perfect way to be in stillness, to mediate or to pray. Some people meditate listening to meditation CD's, some do a walking meditation in nature, some sit in silent meditation, some chant, some listen to meditation music and light a candle, some journal, and some do other things. There are many paths to inner stillness. However we do it, to reserve and take time to regularly
tune out the outside world and go the place of stillness within definitely increases our familiarity with what it feels like in that place inside us all where we hear messages from the soul. This is the place where all intuitively derived information comes from. The more time we spend there, the more familiar we become with this space, the easier it is to receive and trust messages from the animals. Experiment with and commit to doing spiritual exercises which take you to inner stillness once each day.
3. Spend time with animals in stillness. . . time when you are not riding, grooming, feeding, walking or otherwise being engaged in some physical activity or task with them. Spend time simply being in the same room or space with them, perhaps with your eyes closed touching them, or open eyes looking at them, just appreciating them, perhaps saying I love you. Just be with them, vs. doing something with them. Do this without any pressure or agenda to converse or solve a problem. Just be close, without any distraction of tasks, movement or behavior. Because I am so in awe of the beauty of animals, it helps me at times to do this with my eyes closed. Being with animals in stillness fosters our connection with their spirit, rather than only their
bodies, their behavior, or the emotions we believe they may be showing through behavior. Try doing this for just five minutes. You will be amazed at the depth of connection you will feel. It is this depth of connection which fosters telepathic communication. This does not mean you must have this time in stillness before every conversation. However, if you have these moments of stillness together regularly, your readiness to receive and trust telepathic information will be stronger with any animal.
4. Practice in situations where you can get feedback/confirmation from the animal's
person. Offer to practice with friends' animals, or connect with people from workshops you've attended and exchange practice sessions by email, phone or in person, or attend practice groups held by a professional animal communicator. Every single time you receive validation that the information or impressions you received from an animal are correct, consciously allow these successes to build your confidence. There are many times in talking with animals that there is no opportunity for confirmation/physical world verification. Let the times you DO receive validation to build your confidence to carry you through the messages you receive for which there is no validation one way or the other.
5. Create and maintain a validation file or journal. Write down those confirmation moments and stories! Re-read them occasionally to remind yourself of your successful communications. It's so easy to forget or minimize past success. Keeping an informal journal/file/record of your confirmation stories can encourage you to remember that you've already done it well and will do it well again. At times, we all need the encouragement of remembering past success to build our confidence. Let your past competence build your confidence for future competence.
6. Don't expect every single conversation to be a "goose bump" moment. Not every telepathic exchange will be soul deep. Sometimes messages are just about mundane, everyday things. Remember that animals' range of spiritual, intellectual and emotional depth varies from animal to animal, and from day to day—just like with people! I have had incredibly soulful and life changing conversations with a few birds in my garden, and yet others simply say, "Hey, the feeder's empty!!"
7. Trust what you get. Do not sensor what you receive. In talking with animals, invite and allow confirmation to occur naturally. Let the conversation flow. Trust what you hear and sense. Just receive it. Allow organics confirmation versus demanding proof. Stay un-self conscious. Talking with an animal is NOT a performance. It is a sharing of information, feeling or energy between two souls. Dance like nobody’s watching. Confirmation will come organically. Forcing or demanding proof that non-physical reality exists is not conducive to open, clear telepathic communication and open sharing. Allow confirmation to flow in its own time. It will. Let go of any need to demand that the animal or you prove anything.
8. Consider using support from the plant and mineral kingdom to enhance your
telepathic confidence. The animal, mineral and plant kingdoms are all on earth in an inter-related web, each present to help the other. There are numerous flower essences and crystals you might consider to help youlisted below. For a more complete list see: http://www.animalsinourhearts.com/fe/descriptions.htm#2
A powerful throat chakra stone—the energy center associated with both giving and receiving telepathic messages. Larimar opens and supports this energy center, helping us communicate clearly from the heart.
Helps increase confidence in self-expression, or with working with the public, especially with tendency to doubt abilities. Particularly heals the throat/communication chakra needed for telepathy.
Facilitates an integrated sense of natural, deep intuition, sensing and feeling. Helps create a sense of deep understanding to our connection with all of creation through sensing and feeling. Helps us trust our intuition and to access the intuitive root of our being to ground subtle energies.
In any psychic communication distortion and projection can get in the way of receiving clear images and messages. Sometimes our own emotions can inadvertently get in the way. This essence helps us be emotionally clear and objective in the insight and images we perceive telepathically.
Helps heal wounds or doubts we have about opening into our psychic abilities by harmonizing any fear about it. Helps us understand this natural part of us without fearing or repressing it, and trusting our own intuitive sense.
9. Ask for Divine Support. Inter-species communication is a sacred experience. Ask for help and guidance from whomever you pray to and are connected to spiritually. I always ask for the presence of the spirit guides of the animal and person I am talking with, as well as my own guides. I always ask for the help of St. Francis to guide and bless the session. Not only is Divine help available (so why do it alone?!), but knowing it's there for us also helps us remain humble, keeping animal communication in the realm of the sacred, not the ego.
10. Some signs that what you are receiving is probably accurate:
Information/impression is just clear as a bell. Whether the content makes sense to you or not, the clarity is unmistakable to you.
Information/impression is not at all what you would have expected the animal would say
Felt real passion/deep feeling from the animal
When you get very different things from different animals (one animal will be quiet and thoughtful, another chatty, another silly, another sassy, etc.), When we get the same personality or type of response from every animal, we may be filtering (i.e. every message from a whale is about saving the universe or every message from dolphins is about joy. . or every message from companion animals is about their purpose in life).
It's when we get entirely different personalities and messages from each animal that we know we are probably on track and not filtering the information through our values, beliefs or expectations.
The Issue of Guaranteed Outcomes in Animal Communication Consultations
by Teresa Wagner
copyright 2005
For satisfaction to occur in any professional exchange, it helps to begin with clear expectations and boundaries of the service provided. It is my goal and sincere intent that each client I work with feels respected, listened to, cared about and comfortable during a consultation, and, that at the completion of the session they feel their goals for the discussion have been met.
During sessions, I facilitate a process to help clients and their animals explore whatever feelings, issues and problems are important to them. I help them discover and clarify what they are each thinking and feeling, translate and convey messages back and forth between animal and person, support them in attempting to resolve problems together, offer healing interventions or tools where appropriate and desired, and offer coaching for the human on things he or she might do to reinforce what's been discussed and perhaps agreed upon with their animal in a session.
I can guarantee that this is the overall approach I will use in a session, but I cannot guarantee:
What an animal will say in a telepathic conversation
Whether a person will be pleased with what an animal has to say
That problems will be solved or behaviors changed as a result of a consultation
I wish with all my heart that a session with a professional animal communication consultant could guarantee changes in emotions, behavior or health desired by the client and discussed in a session. But an animal communicator can no more guarantee this than a veterinarian can guarantee perfect health or cured disease after a medical intervention, or a therapist can guarantee a cure of depression after a therapy session.
A respectful, loving, thorough and skillful animal communication process can be guaranteed. Outcomes of the process cannot be guaranteed. It is very important to enter a consultation with any animal communicator knowing this.
An effective animal communicator is not only a translator but a good facilitator of problem solving and healing as well. Facilitators of problem solving and healing in any context, with any specialties, cannot guarantee outcomes. Healing and problem solving are often processes that continue over time, not stand alone events. These processes often have multiple layers of issues to sort through, understand and release which may require continued attention beyond one discussion or healing session. Sometimes, of course, when the root cause of a problem is simply a misunderstanding, results can occur immediately. But issues of trauma, or longstanding, deep seated problems cannot be expected to be resolved in one hour.
Please be patient and mindful of these issues when working with an animal communication consultant and your animal.
The Issue of Proof in Animal Communication Consultations
Telepathic communication is not a science. Because of this, proof of it does not come in scientific ways. Telepathic communication is a function of intuition. Therefore it's strongest validation is our own intuitive response to what a communicator tells us our animal is saying or feeling. I will often hear a client say, "You know I knew that but I just wasn't sure," or "I kind of had a vague sense about this but I think I wasn't ready to see it so clearly." Often an animal communication session with a professional consultant is a means for the human client to get validation and support for what they already knew intuitively themselves, to expand on it or go deeper. Sometimes verifiable "evidence" does occur: "Oh wow yes our barn is blue! " "Oh yes, he does just love his pet sitter to pieces, " "Oh yes he does love to sleep by the window, " "Oh yes he definitely hates other cats!" Or simply," That sure sounds like our Fluffy!"
Everybody wants to feel comfortable that the communicator they are working with is connected to their animal. The best way for that to happen is organically—meaning that during the natural flow of the conversation, examples such as the ones above will come through on their own. To try to force proof through what I call information validation questions—"what color is my dog's bowl?" "I need you to tell me something from my animal that only I would know," or "I am going to withhold some important information about my animal because I want you to demonstrate to me that you can figure it out"—is a wasteful exercise.It is understandable that some people want external proof that animal communication is real or even possible.
The need to ask information validation questions is an indication that the person asking does not yet trust intuitively derived information and is asking someone else to make that leap for them. Trusting intuitively derived information that is not physically verifiable is a challenging hurdle for some people to cross. The most effective venue to "find proof," however, is not in a professional animal communication consultation. Coming to terms with whether or not one believes in telepathy with animals is much more effectively done through learning more about it personally, rather than expecting or demanding that someone external to us prove it for us. I heartily recommend learning to trust one's intuition and telepathy from one of the many fine books and CD's available on the subject, by attending seminars and workshops in which you can practice and experience telepathy first hand, or, to simply practice on your own. It is a natural ability within all of us. Our coming to trust it comes from within.
The best and most beautiful things in the world
cannot be seen or even touched.
They must be felt with the heart.
~Helen Keller
In the best-case scenario, a client comes to an animal communication session with a basic level of trust in the process. The client, communicator and animal work together to help build the human client's understanding and trust of the process, as the client asks questions of their animal about issues truly important to the relationship. Confirmation of the information received by the communicator comes organically and everyone is satisfied. In the worst-case scenario, a client comes to the session asking "test" questions. If the communicator and animal do not respond to the human client's liking, the client then disbelieves all other important information the animals wanted the human to understand, despite any organic confirmation of it. Everyone leaves this type of consultation dissatisfied, including the animal. Using an actual consultation to determine whether you believe animal communication is real can be a waste of a client's time and money, a waste of the communicator's energy, and worst of all can be frustrating to the animal who may have important messages that are missed because the session is being used to "test" a communicator regarding factual information they already have, rather than exploring what their animal is feeling and thinking. In my workshops and mentoring sessions, I love to help people learn to trust intuitively derived information and to remember their natural telepathic abilities with animals. In my private consultations, however, I only work with people who already have a basic trust of or openness to telepathic information, even if it is very new to them.
If you are looking for a communicator to prove for you that this work is real, if you need to ask information validation questions or to withhold key descriptive information about your animal to test whether a communicator will get it right, I am not the communicator for you to work with.
My sincere intent is to make clients who come to me feel safe, comfortable, nurtured, understood, and clear about what to expect in a session. If you are looking for a communicator to clarify what your animal is thinking and feeling, to explore--when appropriate--the depths of your animals' emotions and soul, to uncover the root causes of emotional or behavioral issues, or to work through complex issues of healing, I would be an appropriate communicator with whom to work. For more information on the client-centered, empathy-based approach used in my work, you may want to read the article describing this above.
The Whale's Lesson on Death
by Teresa Wagner
copyright 2005
The day was exceptionally warm for early October on the waters off of Provincetown, Massachusetts. Sitting on the bow of the boat feeling warm, gentle breezes touch my skin and hair, I was delighted to need only a tee shirt and shorts to go whale watching in the Gulf of Maine in the Fall. I had been traveling here for many years to see humpbacks in both spring and fall weather. It was a first to have such warmth out on the water. Little did I know that soon I would be stunned by a bigger surprise, and offered one of the most important lessons of my life.
As we made our journey off shore to important humpback feeding grounds of Stellwagon Bank passing the long, sandy shoreline of the Provincetown peninsula, I was in great spirits. It was a long weekend off, I was in the company of good friends, and felt the joyful anticipation of soon seeing humpbacks—my family, my elders, my teachers and guides who I love beyond measure. I was content, full and excited. Suddenly I heard one of my friends standing at the railing say, "Oh God don't let Teresa see this." Everyone was moving to the side of the boat facing the shoreline. I felt a dread inside. I knew, I just knew something was wrong involving a whale. I moved to the side of the boat a saw the dead baby humpback lying on the beach, and the dorsal fins and spouts of two adults swimming nearby. My heart broke seeing the exquisite, young humpback body, out of her water element lying lifeless on the edge of land where she didn't belong. The on board scientist began to speak about the research that would be done to determine possible causes of this death. She cited statistics about collisions with boats and boat motors, entanglements with fishing nets, and toxins in the water poisoning as common causes of injury, disease and death of whales in this area and around the world. Listening, there was this wretched rip of grief in my heart that felt like fire. Though already well aware of many human caused deaths of whales, hearing it again while actually looking at this beautiful, dead whale child, consumed me with anger toward the humans who everyday directly and indirectly cause the death of whales for profit or science. I was angry. I was heartbroken and felt inconsolable.
I went to a far corner of the boat to be by myself, telling my friends I needed some quiet time alone. Just when I thought I might never overcome my struggle to come to peace, I heard a beloved familiar voice. "I am here to hold and support your heart, and to help you see how to better help the whales you love. You've taken a wrong turn here and I will help you find your way back. It's time for you to learn an extremely important lesson. One that will decrease your own pain of outrage and grief and also help the whale who has died and all those who love her." This was the voice of the first whale I ever saw in this life, a soul with whom I have a long and old history, who supports me as a father and wise guide. Sometimes I get lazy and don't listen or act on all the intuitive messages and help I receive. But when he speaks to me, I always, always listen.
"I am going to help you channel the overwhelming, natural energy of your grief into powerful support for the one who has died, for her loved ones, those who may have harmed her, and yourself. This is what I want you to do:
Take a deep breath, steady yourself, and fill yourself with love. Get back in touch with that wellspring of love within you that you know is limitless and ever present. Allow your soul to support your broken heart. Fill your heart and every cell in your body and every space in your energy field with great love. Gently, completely. That's it. Remember the being of love that you are. From this centered place of your soul, which knows peace even in the midst of chaos and pain, remember this: you are never, ever helpless to shower someone in pain or suffering with great love, even when you cannot help on the physical plane.
Send this great love to the soul of the whale who has died. Send it with peacefulness, gentleness and calm, yet with great power and intention from the depth of your soul. Surround her soul with all the love of the universe. Thank her for having graced the earth with her presence. Ask for blessings for the journey of her soul through all time and space. Bow to her in awe and gratitude for all she was and is.
Send this same great love and also comfort to the loved ones of this whale. As much as you hurt, they are the primary grievers of this loss and hurt even more. It is important to tend to them before yourself. Surround them with great depths of love and the energy of soft, nurturing comfort and compassion. Let them know they are not alone in their grief. That you, too, care deeply about their great loss.
Send this same great love and deep compassion now to those you believe may have caused the death of this whale and others—those you see as the perpetrators. This is where you took a wrong turn earlier. You became stuck when you went directly to anger at those who caused the suffering, rather than going first to Love. Now, send the same limitless love to those known and unknown to you who created this death, to those who are not yet able to see and act from their hearts, to those who are not yet conscious enough to see the souls of animals. Send them love, for it is only with compassion and love that their consciousness will expand and their hearts will see. Send them compassion because at one time you, too, were not as conscious as you are today, and it was from the compassion of others that you grew.
Now, express and tend to your own grief and pain. Do what you need to do to express your own grief and anger. Honor your own feelings, however deep, dark, confusing or contradictory they may be. Ask for help from those you trust to understand, beings on earth and in Spirit, to help you fully express and release your pain. (Do not expect the one who died or her loved ones to support you. They are the primary grievers and need your support. You are a secondary griever and need support from others. There is always, always enough love and support for everyone. It is important to discern when to turn to whom.) Now is the time for you to take care of yourself, reaching out for help from your own soul and from earthly and spiritual beings who will understand. Your own heart and pain is as important as the whales' pain. Tend to yourself now with great compassion and love.
I followed his suggestions as he spoke them. None of what he said was entirely new to me. But I had never done these things in this order, in this type of situation. Remarkably, by the time I even completed the second step, my own anger and grief was tremendously lessened. By the time I got to the step of asking for and receiving help for my own heart, hardly any help was needed because I was so filled with the grace of meeting these souls with love.
I still get angry with people who harm animals. I still grieve deeply when animals die. But now I consciously respond and process my feelings in a different way and in a different order. This allows me to better serve the animals I love so much, and allows my own suffering to move to quiet acceptance and peace much sooner.
When I see animals on the side of the road, obviously killed by a human's vehicle, I now use this process. I used to feel greatly overwhelmed by grief, and with anger at the speeding drivers and humans who allowed animal habitat to be turned into highways. Now, using this process, I no longer feel overwhelmed and alienated. I feel part of a process of healing for all. My level of compassion has matured. My ability to help has increased. I am very grateful.
The process is not about ignoring one's own grief. It's about dealing with it after first offering love and compassion to those directly impacted.
The process is not about pretending suffering does not exist, that people on earth do not harm animals, or condoning what they do. It's about showering those who create the suffering with Love rather than adding the energy of anger and hatred to souls already unconscious about animals.
The process is not about sending love instead of helping practically. It's about sending love in addition to any political action, rescue efforts, donations etc. in which we choose to get involved.
My whale father described it best: it's about channeling our overwhelming, natural energy of grief and anger in response to harm into powerful support for the actual animals who are harmed, for their loved ones, those who have caused the harm, and ourselves. It's about showering suffering with Love.
May all beings be at peace.
May all beings be bathed in love and compassion.
Preparing for and Getting the Most
From an Animal Communication Session About Behavior Issues
by Teresa Wagner
copyright 2007
Along with the love and joy, living with beings of different species can present challenges. The cultures of every species, our natural ways of living on the earth, vary greatly. Behavioral problems often occur when an animal acting naturally according to their culture (e.g. barking or digging, jumping up in greeting, or sharpening little claws in our furniture), clashes with our preferred way of living (e.g., wanting peace and quiet, a yard without gaping holes, or an unfrayed sofa).
In addition, everyone’s tolerance level for certain behaviors varies. In attempting to work out what we
perceive and label as "behavioral problems" it’s very important to be clear about our boundaries and needs, to
give on-going, careful consideration to what we can live with and what we cannot and why. It's equally
important that we learn about and take into consideration the natural, and often important, cultural and social
needs of our animals required to keep them healthy and happy. For our animals to be able to meet our
expectations, we must both communicate clearly with them and be realistic about what can be expected. It
helps to be open to the ideas, needs and requests an animal may reveal in a telepathic conversation, and to be
willing to express empathy for their reasons for doing what they’re doing, even when we don’t condone the
behavior.
An animal communication session is not about commanding your animal to behave in a certain way.
It's about respectfully finding out why an animal is behaving a certain way, educating them about why their
behavior is unacceptable or worrisome to you, and negotiating changes.
The remaining material of this document has three sections:
1. BEFORE YOUR SESSION: Thorough preparation to save time during the session
2. DURNG THE SESSION: What to expect and how to get the most out of the session
3. AFTER THE SESSION: Tips and techniques to reinforce what was discussed or agreed upon
I wish you many blessings and look forward to talking with you and your animal soon,
Namaste'
Teresa
BEFORE YOUR SESSION:
Please read through the following questions, reflect upon them, then send your responses to my office email
(legaciesoflove@earthlink.net) at least 24 hours before your session so I have a chance to read them
beforehand. Please limit what you send to two pages. Please send your information in typed, not handwritten
form if at all possible. Thank you for taking the time to do this. Doing so will definitely allow more time
during your session for me to actually talk with your animal. Additionally, the increased clarity that may
result from specific reflection upon these issues may help and support you both before and after your
consultation in working with your animal toward the changes you desire.
1. For each animal:
Name, Species, Gender, Age and Basic Physical Description or Photo
(and breed information if important or significant), how long you have lived together,
and how you came to live together
2. What is the behavior(s) causing you concern?
Please describe the behavior(s) as specifically as possible, including any relevant context.
How long has it been going on?
Have any other significant things changed in your animal's life near the time the behavior problem
began (or worsened) ? (i.e. animal or person coming into or leaving the family, home change, diet
change, training change, activity change, health change)
If your animal were to turn this issue around and "behave ideally," what would that look like?
Please describe as specifically as possible:
3. How does the animal's behavior impact you?
How does it make you feel? (i.e. does it make you angry? frustrated? impatient? exasperated? confused?
feel disrespected? worried about them? concerned? curious?
Why is this behavior unacceptable? Or worrisome? Some examples:
Costing money to buy new furniture/carpet/for vet visits, other expenses?
Extra time and energy needed to clean up messes?
Sleep deprived/cranky next day if kept up at night?
Afraid that someone will get hurt?
Worried that something is wrong and want my animal to have the best possible life
Regarding this behavior(s), are you mostly concerned about:
the impact your animal's behavior is having on you and your life?
concerned/worried about your animal?
both?
4. Have there been any attempts to try to change the behavior (i.e. your own efforts, working with
a trainer, behaviorist, other animal communicators, TTouch, flower essences)?
If so, what were they and how have they helped?
Are there consequences/changes you have considered if the behavior does not change?
(i.e. may have to sleep in garage if continue to meow all night; may be crated when people not at
home if continue to urinate on rugs)
If so, please describe:
5. In summary, ask yourself (no need to send this to me, just reflect upon it):
What is it that I really want and why?
Do I believe this is reasonable, considering my animal's species, breed, age,
environment, or other factors?
Is there anything that I might be doing to contribute to the problem?
WHAT TO EXPECT DURING YOUR SESSION:
My stance is not to “take a side” and lecture your animals about what they are doing that is
unacceptable to you, or to lecture you about how you might not be meeting your animal’s needs, or to tell you
what you should do. Rather, as in the process of mediation, my goal is to help both you and your animal
clearly understand each others’ positions and feelings regarding the problem, to be sure everyone involved
understands how the problem impacts everyone else, to identify the deepest known root cause of the problem,
and to help negotiate solutions. Though each situation varies, a typical consultation regarding a behavioral
problem progresses with these elements:
• First, I will make sure I understand your situation from your perspective, clarifying what you
have described in the pre-session questions about the problem: Exactly what is your animal doing or
not doing that is unacceptable to you, why is it unacceptable/ it's impact on you, what you have tried so
far, and what an ideal change would look like to you. The time is takes to do this is considerably
shortened when you send your responses to the questions in advance of the session.
I have found that it is equally important to define the “why” of the problem as it is to define “what” it
is. When I tell animals “why” you're concerned about a behavior, it helps them understand what you value.
This often influences their choice to support you and what is important to you easier. For instance, each
human whose cat is going out of the box may have a different reason about why this is not acceptable to them.
One person might not be able to stand the smell while another might resent the work of clean up. Another
person might be concerned about the cost of replacing carpet and yet another might not care about any of
these, but may be concerned that her spouse is threatening to give the cat away if the behavior doesn’t stop. It
is important to communicate to our animals not only the “what” of a behavioral problem, but “why” it is of
concern to us. It helps give them a better understanding of our needs and the human culture to which we are
asking them to adapt, and often increases their motivation to make the changes we ask for.
• Once I am clear about your human perspective of the problem, I then connect with the animals
and ask them to help me understand their experience and their perspective of the situation. In specific
pictures and words, I describe the behavior you are concerned about, in a neutral tone, void of any tone of
reprimand and without an immediate request for change. Rather than beginning with demands for change or
threats of consequences, I begin by asking animals gentle, clarifying questions to help us better understand
their experience of the same event(s) that is not working for you. Rather than asking "why do you do that?"
which makes most of us defensive, I will ask neutral questions such as, "could you tell me what this is all
about for you?" or "I want to understand. . . what's going on for you when you such and such happens?"
I'll let you know all info I receive on this so you have a chance to respond—whether with need for
more clarity, more questions, or any comments you want to make to your animal after hearing what this
situation is about for them. We may go back and forth a few times, as needed, to clarify this information.
Sometimes, this information immediately makes clear to the human what needs to be done to help the
situation and we move right into negotiating or describing changes.
If their reaction doesn’t easily and quickly reveal the reason for their behavior, then I use more gentle, probing
questions to identify the deepest level root cause (that they are aware of) about why they are doing what
they’re doing. Sometimes this is accomplished quickly, especially when the root cause is something easy to
remedy in the physical world (i.e. “I don’t like the smell of the new litter; please can we go back to the old
kind.”) Other times, it can be very complex and involve long-standing, deep seated emotional issues-- either
t
had been such a long time. Such a long time since I had seen him.
Over a year at least. I wasn't
prepared. I just wasn't prepared for what happened. As we approached his
corral he ran to me. Oh God the sight of him--still as sleek and beautiful
to me as Black Beauty in his prime. How could he possibly be over 30!
He's just gorgeous. Bless him, he wasn't angry that it had been so long.
He let me stroke his face even more than when I had seen him every week--and
let me kiss his face, something he had never allowed before.
uffering
from bloat, Lambchop was in great pain. My shy, sheep friend was
also emotionally devastated from the loss of his beloved sheep companion,
Baby Doll, who died that day. I gave him Five Flower Formula for his emotional and physical trauma which he relished having rubbed
around his mouth and gums. As I laid with him on the hay, holding his
head and offering Reiki, he kept telling me he didn't know whether he
wanted to leave his body to join his friend or stay with those who loved
him here. He was very pulled, very unsure. Over and over I let him know
that either decision would be supported and that I would stay with him
as he decided (had I had Schleranthus with me I would have given
him that also to help him make his decision). I love this sheep
and very much wanted the delight of his continued company on earth. I
knew, though, that my role was to give him all the space and support he
needed to make his own best choice. Much as I "knew better",
I'm afraid that without the help of Red Chestnut (for me)
my bias to have him stay may have been inappropriately communicated. With
its help, however, I was able to calmly and genuinely trust in the wisdom
of his soul to make his choice, to cherish our moments of intimacy and
remain unattached to the outcome. Lambchop decided to stay. After medication
and a vet visit (to which he was transported in the air conditioned front
seat of a truck, much to the delight of passersby), he is now home in
his pasture. No longer shy, he is absolutely full of himself, charmingly
demanding of love and attention, and very happy. He says this is because "I decided to stay. Baby Doll didn't pressure me to go to
her nor did you pressure me to stay. I did what I really wanted to do.
I was so scared before you came. It hurt so much and I could see Baby
Doll just above me. I was so confused. Holding me and the drops made me
calm. Pretty soon I just knew I wanted to stay. Now I like being a star."
ears
before Lambchop, a little Blue Jay waddled over to me in my garden
one morning. He clearly didn't feel well and said, "The other birds
told me to come to you, that you would be able to help me die." I
was immediately smitten with this beautiful little being and began a completely
inappropriate campaign to convince him to live. I told him about essences.
He wasn't interested. I told him about a wildlife rehab center just up
the road. He wasn't interested. I pushed the issue. I didn't feel he was
near death and that he could be helped. I chased the poor bird around
my garden trying to get him in a box to take to the rehab center. Finally,
he went so far beneath a rose bush I couldn't reach him. I told him I
was on my way to a volunteers' luncheon at that very rehab center and
would talk with him again when I returned. I left a small bowl of water
with Five Flower Formula. When I returned, I found him beneath
the same rose bush where I left him, dead. The shame of what I had done
overwhelmed with me with remorse. As I cried and cried and held his little
body against my chest, his Spirit said to me, "All I wanted, all
I asked was for you to be with me. I just didn't want to be alone when
I died. That's all I wanted and you didn't listen." I have never
been so utterly ashamed of myself in my life. I knew better. I
can hear animals. I talk to them everyday, but I didn't listen to this
precious little bird's simple request. I am comfortable with death; I
am around death regularly. I counsel others on accepting death, but here
I was, little miss animal communicator and grief counselor, and I couldn't
honor this being's request to die with my companionship. As I continued
to sob and hold him, I was filled with self-loathing. He then lectured
me, gently and compassionately, about the need to transform my self-pity
and self-blame into learning--that it was simply time for me to learn.
I was to take some feathers from his body to remind me next time to
listen. I tried to pull a few feathers from his body and it just seemed
so awful to pull them, even though I knew his dead body could feel no
pain. I hesitated. He then said in a joking, affectionate way, "OK,
you can cut them off with a scissors, but you better do it. If you don't
listen to me this time I'm going to be really pissed." I listened!
And thankfully, for Lambchop, whose path I crossed later, I learned.
